A fond niece brought to my attention a konkani trait to address elders as maam (uncle) and pachchi (aunt), and triggered a lovely and lively discussion between us as to what constitutes an elder. Chronological age connotes an elder in the most obvious sense, and in that sense, and possibly in that sense only, she stated factually that I am older (does that make me an elder?) and, thus, deserving of being called a maam. In this context, I conceded defeat! But, it triggered in my mind a discussion about what constitutes age, and its many dimensions.
Wildness of thought, and spontaneity of action are two teenage characteristics that I treasure to this day. I must admit that I do receive, "Oh, you are not a teenager any more," or "You are no spring chicken" looks or comments from the maams and pachchis that are spread far and wide. I feel sorry to see them in that state of conditioning - everyone is born to enjoy life in its many-splendored forms, and not to live by the "do"s and "don't"s, what "looks" good at a certain chronological age and what doesn't, what "people" will think and what they won't.
Think of all the things that would tickle your spine with a feather when you are a stereotypical teenager - the feeling that you are on top of the world and invincible, that the whole wide world is out of its mind, getting the kick of being anti-establishment, the goosebumps you get when you think you got that rare glance from the guy/gal of your dreams, the state of the resulting ecstasy you can relish for a long time, when you write lines of poetry about anything and everything, when you can climb trees and jump fences without the fear of falling or getting caught, when you can go to a movie the night before an important exam and not feel anxious, when there is no good or no bad time to eat the street-side snack, getting high with a just a sip of beer or a puff of smoke. The list goes on and on. I thought I'd have to run far down memory lane to jot down this list. The good news is that I didn't have to. The best news is that I just had to look at myself the way I am.
It is at that point that "society" creeps in with its ugly head. The public display of (benign) affection such as walking in public holding hands with your beloved is considered immature, hence tolerable during teenage, and is considered inappropriate in middle age, and then it again becomes cool and admirable to do so in old age! The scriptures become prescriptive of the lifestyle supposed to be led in mid-life. People take on the self-anointed and self-appointed role of moral policemen and policewomen. Self-deprivation is not sufficient; it becomes necessary for them to monitor and enforce the deprivation of others from their respective pursuits of their discretions (or, indiscretions per a righteous frame of mind). In short, maams and pachchis come into being!
What would the world be like without the maams and pachchis? We would all remain young at heart - the only age that matters - and, that too by our own free will and choice. The late Bhausaheb Patankar, a lawyer by profession and a poet by heart says that one may accept age by logical circumstance (as how my niece proved to me) and not by how you feel. There are those amongst us that age at a very young age (sic), and there are some of us that never do.
"Just do it" says the Nike tag-line with its swoosh logo. What power!
Wildness of thought, and spontaneity of action are two teenage characteristics that I treasure to this day. I must admit that I do receive, "Oh, you are not a teenager any more," or "You are no spring chicken" looks or comments from the maams and pachchis that are spread far and wide. I feel sorry to see them in that state of conditioning - everyone is born to enjoy life in its many-splendored forms, and not to live by the "do"s and "don't"s, what "looks" good at a certain chronological age and what doesn't, what "people" will think and what they won't.
Think of all the things that would tickle your spine with a feather when you are a stereotypical teenager - the feeling that you are on top of the world and invincible, that the whole wide world is out of its mind, getting the kick of being anti-establishment, the goosebumps you get when you think you got that rare glance from the guy/gal of your dreams, the state of the resulting ecstasy you can relish for a long time, when you write lines of poetry about anything and everything, when you can climb trees and jump fences without the fear of falling or getting caught, when you can go to a movie the night before an important exam and not feel anxious, when there is no good or no bad time to eat the street-side snack, getting high with a just a sip of beer or a puff of smoke. The list goes on and on. I thought I'd have to run far down memory lane to jot down this list. The good news is that I didn't have to. The best news is that I just had to look at myself the way I am.
It is at that point that "society" creeps in with its ugly head. The public display of (benign) affection such as walking in public holding hands with your beloved is considered immature, hence tolerable during teenage, and is considered inappropriate in middle age, and then it again becomes cool and admirable to do so in old age! The scriptures become prescriptive of the lifestyle supposed to be led in mid-life. People take on the self-anointed and self-appointed role of moral policemen and policewomen. Self-deprivation is not sufficient; it becomes necessary for them to monitor and enforce the deprivation of others from their respective pursuits of their discretions (or, indiscretions per a righteous frame of mind). In short, maams and pachchis come into being!
What would the world be like without the maams and pachchis? We would all remain young at heart - the only age that matters - and, that too by our own free will and choice. The late Bhausaheb Patankar, a lawyer by profession and a poet by heart says that one may accept age by logical circumstance (as how my niece proved to me) and not by how you feel. There are those amongst us that age at a very young age (sic), and there are some of us that never do.
"Just do it" says the Nike tag-line with its swoosh logo. What power!
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